Desurammal
When Bhagavan was at Virupaksha cave, a lady named Akhilandammal came from a village called Desur. Bhagavan and the others began to call her Desurammal, as Akhilandammal was a bit too long a name. Desurammal had seen Bhagavan in 1896 when Bhagavan was in a state of samadhi and the priest had poured milk into his mouth. Desurammal witnessed it and went back to her village without getting Bhagavan’s blessings as his eyes were closed. Not being able to stay away, she came back to Tiruvannamalai after seven years. She was a very devout person and served food to all the sadhus, including Seshadri Swami and Swami Vithoba of Polur.
It was 1903 when she returned. She was plucking flowers at the foot of Arunachala. A crowd was going up to the banyan tree cave which is below Virupaksha cave. She asked, “Where are all of you going?” Someone replied, “Oh, there is an ascetic boy who does not talk, doesn’t even move, but there is such peace, such grace there!” Desurammal also went to the cave. She saw Bhagavan seated there. This is what she had to say about Bhagavan: “Even though he was unwashed and covered with dust, his body had a golden glow. On seeing this ascetic with his body frame so lean that it exposed his bones, my heart melted and tears welled up within me. The young Lord then opened his eyes and graciously directed them at me. Instantaneously, I surrendered myself totally and took a vow to serve food to this jnani all my life.” When Bhagavan moved to Virupaksha cave, she served food to him there. Bhagavan rarely ate alone. So, she brought food for others like Palani Swami and Perumal Swami as well. Earlier, they begged for food. After Mother Desurammal came, there was no dearth of food during lunch for Bhagavan. She was so captivated by Bhagavan’s presence that she came with food every day without fail.
Later, two other ladies, Echammal and Mudaliar Paati, also started feeding Bhagavan. Assured that Bhagavan would be regularly fed, Desurammal went back to her village and started a Ramana center there in 1914. It was called Ramanananda Madalayam. Her devotion was so deep that she was always there, observing Bhagavan’s teachings and giving expositions about them from the depth of her own experience. Whenever any of the devotees of Bhagavan at Virupaksha cave fell sick, she would take them to Desur, give them medical aid and take care of them. When they had fully recovered, she would escort them back to Virupaksha cave.
Kunju Swami told me that whenever Desurammal came to Arunachala, in addition to whoever had been feeding Bhagavan, she would also feed them. Bhagavan was very pleased with her. Her first observation about Bhagavan was that he was the only saint she had fed who shared his food equally with others. The second thing she noticed was that the food was shared equally, not only with just the people around him, but also with dogs, monkeys and birds. She narrated a humourous incident about Nondi the monkey. He was always given a seat next to Bhagavan. While she was serving the master one day, Nondi snarled at her. Bhagavan chided him, “Hey! She is one of us. She belongs to our clan, keep quiet!” The monkey then accepted her as one amongst them!
Kunju Swami impressed on me that Bhagavan did not merely express gratitude to everyone who fed him. Bhagavan shared with them the purest teaching - one that would completely release them from bondage. Once, when Desurammal came to Skandashram, a sadhu told her, “Today is a full moon day. It is the most powerful day for getting initiation. In Bhagavan you have a perfect jnani. So, ask Bhagavan for initiation today.” Induced by this sadhu, she prostrated before Bhagavan who rarely gave initiation. He asked her, “What do you want, Desurammal?” “Bhagavan, you have to initiate me with some mantra.” “Oh! You want a mantra.” he replied. Then, becoming serious he sat down and said in Tamil, “Unnai vidaadhu iru,” which means, ‘remain without leaving your Self’. Desurammal said that he did not just say that and leave. He looked at her and transfixed her with his silent grace. Riveting his look on her for nearly an hour, he also gave her the inner knowledge of how to remain without giving up the experience of the Self.
Even after Bhagavan came down to settle at the foot of the hill, she used to bring food every day. One day, Bhagavan told her, “Desurammal, there is enough food here.” Beseechingly she said, “Bhagavan, I want to feed you.” He replied, “Bring your provisions and leave them in the kitchen. They will cook and we will all share.” From then on, whenever she came, she would bring some rice or dal and leave it in the kitchen.
During the last days of Bhagavan, when Bhagavan was to drop the body, Desurammal was quite old and very infirm. Yet, since she could not remain without having a last darshan and a last look, this Mother went to him. Bhagavan was in what is now called the Nirvana Room. Nobody recognized Desurammal because the whole management had changed. She was prevented from entering. Fortunately, Kunju Swami recognized her and told Bhagavan, who exclaimed, “Desurammal! Bring her here, bring her inside.” When she went in, she wept seeing Bhagavan’s physical condition and Bhagavan said, “Why do you feel sorry for this mortal body? Naan Yeppozudhum Un Bhagavan thaaney – Am I not always your Bhagavan?”
These words of solace were not only for Desurammal. For whoever turns to Bhagavan as the image of father, mother, guru or God, the assurance that he is their saviour, is ever present.
Sri Bhagavan at Skandashram
Sri Bhagavan seated outside Virupaksha Cave