The week before the Mahapuja (3rd June, 1937) has brought many visitors including some relatives of Sri Bhagavan. There is among them an elderly lady —the widow of Subbier in whose house Sri Bhagavan was living when he left home in August 1896. Old memories revived when Sri Bhagavan saw her.
He remembered how on a festive occasion he was asked to help her in making some modakas (delicacies), but he hesitated and finally refused, because he was obliged to change his clothes and he could put on only koupina (loin-cloth or cod-piece) which made him feel shy. He was reprimanded by his uncle and this lady. The uncle’s wife said with humility and gentleness: “Quite. No wonder that one destined for this High State could not do such humble work in those days.”
Then Sri Bhagavan remarked, “If I refused to wear koupina once, I am now made to pay the penalty by wearing it always.”
The lady recalled to her mind how Sri Ramana was suffering from head-ache for several days together.
Sri Bhagavan said:—Yes, yes! It was the month before I left Madura. It was not head-ache, but an inexpressible anguish which I suppressed at the time; there were however the outward symptoms which, I said, were due to head-ache. I remember how anxious you grew on account of my “head-ache”. You used to rub some ointment on my forehead every day. My anguish continued until I left Madura and reached this place.