A MOTHER’S TALE – II
My mother’s last days in the local government hospital were unforgettable ones. I used to do my work in the ashram from half past three in the morning to eight at night. Then I would go to the hospital, stay with her, attend to her needs and keep her company. Those days, we were often left alone and undisturbed. She was suffering from cardiac asthma, a very painful and fatal disease. Whenever I cried, on seeing her suffering from breathlessness, she got very angry with me. “Is this all that you have learnt from the teachings of Bhagavan and after having lived with me for so many years? Am I the body? The body may suffer, or may not suffer. How are we concerned about that? I am the Self. So too are you, my son. The moment of witnessing death, either of oneself or that of a dear one, is a great opportunity for one to get established in enlightenment! I bless you! Let your attention be on Awareness, always”. Following my mother’s words, I keenly observed her during her last moments. She passed away, fully conscious, and with a beautiful smile on her face! Thus, on that eventful day, she blessed me by helping me drop whatever little attachment that I had for the world!
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About three days before her death, a reputed doctor residing in the town, along with the government doctor, examined my mother. They took me aside and told me that my mother’s condition was very bad. She needed intensive care and advanced treatment. These were not available locally. They suggested that I take her to Madras, Vellore or Pondicherry. After they left, my mother called me and asked me what the doctors had said. I told her the truth. She held my hands and with tears in her eyes, pleaded with me, “I want you to make two promises to me. Under no circumstances should you go back on these.”
My mother was and still is my upa-guru, the one who helps and directs one to the sadguru. I swore to her sincerely that I would fulfill my promises. I asked her humbly what she wanted me to do. She said, “Don’t take this body while it still lives, away from Arunachala. Secondly, don’t permit the doctors to give sedatives and put me in an unconscious state”. I promised to adhere to her instructions.
However, I requested her to explain her strange demand. She said, “One day, when I was assisting the lady cooks in the ashram kitchen, Bhagavan came in and specifically turning his attention on me, said, ‘One should die consciously. If one dies consciously, one is blessed to have no more births. On the other hand, dying unconsciously is a sure sign of having another birth and entering into another body.’ Therefore my dear son, give me the chance to die consciously. You already know from Bhagavan’s Collected Works that by staying within the radius of thirty miles of Arunachala, one is assured of enlightenment! Please see that I leave this heavy burden of a body, as enjoined by my beloved master”.
By Bhagavan’s grace, despite stiff resistance, I succeeded in keeping my mother’s sick and suffering body at Arunachala and let her to be Absorbed in Arunachala at Arunachala.
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