In the course of conversation, someone referred to the fact that when Mr. Brunton and a lady were walking home in the night, they saw a bright glow on half the hill moving slowly and gently from North to South.
Sri Bhagavan said: This hill is said to be wisdom in visible shape.
D.: How is it visible to the physical eye?
M.: Sambandar had sung “The One who fascinated my heart or the captivator of my heart, I sing of Him in my mind”. The Heart is captivated; consequently the mind must have sunk into the Heart; and yet there is the remembrance which enables the saint to sing of God later.
Then the experience of a young disciple was mentioned. The young man, educated and in good circumstances, in good health and sober mind, was once facing Sri Bhagavan’s picture in his home and meditating on the figure. The figure suddenly appeared animated with life, which threw the young man into a spasm of fear. He called out for his mother. His mother came and asked him what the matter was. He was surrounded by his relatives who were perplexed by his appearance. He was aware of their presence, but was still overpowered by a mysterious force which he tried to resist. He became unconscious for a short time. Fear seized him as he regained consciousness. The people became anxious and tried to bring him round with medicines.
When later he came to Tiruvannamalai he had some foreboding of similar experience. The proximity of Sri Bhagavan once prevented any untoward happening. But whenever he wandered away from the hall he found the force almost irresistible and himself in the grip of fear. Sri Bhagavan said: “Is it so? No one told me this before.”
A devotee asked, if it was not (descent of divine power)?
M.: Yes, it is. A mad man clings to his , whereas a does not. That is the only difference between the two. is madness of a kind.
D.: But is said to occur in karmasāmya i.e. when merit and demerit are equal.
M.: Yes. Malaparipāka, karmasāmya and mean the same. A man is running the course of his ; when taught that he is the Self, the teaching affects his mind and imagination runs riot. He feels helpless before the onrushing power. His experiences are only according to his imagination of the state “I am the Self,” whatever he may conceive it to be. Saktipata alone confers the true and right experience.
When the man is ripe for receiving the instruction and his mind is about to sink into the Heart, the instruction imparted works in a flash and he realises the Self all right. Otherwise, there is always the struggle.
Mano-nāsa, , and chittaikāgrta (annihilation of the mind, knowledge and one-pointedness) mean the same.