Paragraph 8

In plain words

The Paramahamsa asked, Well, won't Shivanath come?" A Brahmo devotee said, "No, he has a great deal of work today; he won't be able to come." The Paramahamsa said, "I feel great joy when I see Shivanath; he seems steeped in the sweetness of devotion. And when many people count a man as somebody and honour him, he surely has some power of God in him. But Shivanath has one serious fault: his word cannot be relied on. He had told me that he would come there once (to the Kali temple at Dakshineswar), but he did not come, and he did not send word either; that is not good. The saying goes that truthfulness alone is the austerity of the Kaliyuga. If one holds fast to truth, one attains God. If one does not hold fast to truth, everything is lost little by little. Thinking of this, if ever I happen to say that I shall go to answer the call of nature, then even if the need does not come, I still take the water-pot along and go once toward the pine grove. The fear is this: that I may lose my hold on truth. After this state came upon me, I took flowers in my hand and said to the Mother, 'Mother! Here is Your knowledge, here is Your ignorance; give me pure devotion, Mother. Here is Your purity, here is Your impurity; give me pure devotion, Mother. Here is Your good, here is Your evil; give me pure devotion, Mother. Here is Your merit, here is Your sin; give me pure devotion.' When I said all this, I could not say this: Mother! Here is Your truth, here is Your untruth. I could give everything to the Mother; I could not give 'truth' to the Mother."