Kudlu – Kadri Hill

(i) Pranayama

Kudlu is a countryside two miles to the north of Kasaragod. Ramdas was lodged in a tiled house of three rooms on the slope of a valley, above which was an extensive uninhabited plateau, green with verdure and shrubs. At the foot of the house was a shallow excavation, from one side of which was flowing down a narrow jet of pure sparkling water, supplied by a hidden spring. Majestic silence reigned over the valley. It was a fit abode for undisturbed meditation. God willed that Ramdas should live in such a place.

In right earnest Ramdas started the practice of pranayama. For long hours he would sit up for the exercise. He became in regard to food highly eccentric. The supplies came from Anandrao who was visiting him every morning to look after his needs. His pure love made him bear with remarkable patience Ramdas’ innumerable freaks and fancies in the matter of diet. He changed his diet from day to day from one thing to another, and at last, went for some days on mere water-fast. Then he would again revert to the usual means.

These experiments in diet coupled with incessant practice of pranayama reduced his body and gradually weakened it. The mind lapsed into a state of perfect listlessness and torpor. It seemed to have descended into the very depths of inexpressible stillness and silence. On and on the practice continued. The utterance of the mantram stopped entirely. All the hours of the day and night were devoted, almost without break, for control of breath. At times due to over-exhaustion he would drop down an emaciated and limp figure. The raja-yogi who initiated him came on a visit. He watched the keen struggle through which he was passing and encouraged him on. He advised Ramdas to feed the body properly. One thing, however, became evident to Ramdas – this exercise was dealing a death-blow to memory, reason and the subtler emotions of the heart. The mind became blank and arid – inactivity and silence was the result.

It was the will of the Lord that Ramdas should also gain this experience of pranayama – a mode of mind-control prescribed by the great sage Patanjali. This discipline forms a part of ashtanga yoga as taught by the sage. It is incumbent on the aspirant that he should follow all the eight rules of the yoga together, of which asan and pranayama are two. Brahmacharya or continence is held to be absolutely necessary, as also a watchful guidance from an experienced teacher of yoga. The path is not meant for all people. Householders, engaged in affairs of life, will do well to avoid it. For, failure in observance of the rules of this yoga is likely to cause derangement of the brain and other diseases. For the householder the most suitable discipline for concentration of mind is repetition of the divine Name and devotional music, in other words, the path of bhakti or devotion. The practice of pranayama continued unabated for a month, and then Ramdas gave it up. The usual repetition of the mantram became once more an automatic function of the tongue. Activity returned, and he took long walks on the meadow both in the morning and evening. He wandered aimlessly. The extensive view of the green vegetation all around absorbed him. He witnessed his own loneliness – his mind resting on the bosom of the motionless spirit of tranquility. The world about him looked like a vast glistening canvas on which pictures of variegated tints were laid by a master artist – the green earth below and the blue expanse above were bathed in the bright glory of the sun.

In the course of his rambles he was accosted by a Muslim: “Why do you come near our habitation? Our children get frightened on seeing you. Will it not be better for you to adhere to your solitary retreat?”

Ramdas heard and passed on.

On another occasion he unconsciously directed his steps towards the seaside which lay about a mile and a half from the retreat. He had to pass through a small village peopled by Muslims. When he was walking along one of the streets, a number of Muslim boys clustered round him and stopped his progress. They began to pat on his head, pull his ears and nose, make faces at and dance round him. He liked the fun and also danced in wild delight with them. All the while, some Muslim mothers were observing the scene from a distance. Thinking that the boys were harassing Ramdas, they rushed forward and drove them away.

He continued his stroll to the seashore. He sat on the sands looking on the giant waves rolling noisily and lashing against the rocks on the shore. He remained for a time in a state of complete abstraction as his eyes swept on the limitless azure sheet of water before him. Then he retraced his steps to his abode.

(ii) The Battle of Elements

In this blissful and undisturbed retreat, insects and birds freely gave Ramdas the joy of their society. They would unhesitatingly enter the rooms and play about fearlessly. They seemed to have instinctively understood that he was their friend. Surely, for Ramdas they were manifestations of the great Truth that he adored and loved. He would share his eatables with them.

At this place, as inspired by the Lord, he composed some poems, prayers and essays. These have already been published in the book ‘At the Feet of God’.

The season being monsoon the nights were attended with heavy showers. One memorable night the rainfall was unusually violent. There were deafening peals of thunder preceded by flashes of lightning. Rain and storm raged in all their fury. A mass of rushing water was dashing against the sides of the house. Every thunder-crash shook the building to its very foundation. The maddened wind was whistling through the shutterless windows beating torrential showers of rain into the room. In the midst of this warfare of the elemental gods, Ramdas was seated unmoved in the room, in a state of perfect exaltation, watching the progress of the terrific scene. Every situation of dread and danger only hardened the fibre of his being. The terrors of the storm did not affect him. The Truth – God within him – spoke out:

“I am in the storm, the wind and the rain. I am in the thunder and the lightning. I am the active creator, the merciful protector and ruthless destroyer. I am all in all. I am all.”

The storm still raged on. Ramdas heard a sudden thud on the floor about two yards from where he sat. He turned in the direction from which the sound came and discovered a big wild cat, black as jet, standing with a fixed gaze at him. It had jumped down from the top of the wall. Its lustrous eyes gleamed in the dim corner of the room. Ramdas at once stood up and taking the lantern walked towards it. It was about twice the size of an ordinary cat – tall, gaunt and ferocious. It did not await Ramdas’ approach. It leapt on the nearest window sill and, wriggling out through the iron bars, disappeared into the rain and darkness outside. Till morning Ramdas enjoyed the glorious battle of the elements.

One evening a devotee from Kasaragod came to fetch him. It was arranged to perform a Nagar bhajan. He, in the company of a saint belonging to the Sri Krishna Chaitanya cult of Bengal and other devotees, danced to the music of nama sankirtan in the street procession. Ever since this event he was frequently coming to the town. On one occasion he had the darshan of Swami Shivananda, the preceptor of the raja-yogi who initiated him into pranayama.

After his return to Kasaragod, Ramdas had a three days’ water-fast during which he stopped with an old devout mother in the town. The fast broken, he proceeded again to Mangalore and stopped for some time on the Kadri hill.

(iii) Enter Ramcharandas

Ramdas reached Mangalore by an evening train and directly made his way to the Kadri hill. He came to a dharmashala, situated close to the famous seven tanks. The rest-house was in charge of a young boy by name Madhav. The boy welcomed him with unfeigned delight. He offered Ramdas a deer skin on which he took his seat on a raised platform. Madhav was a well-built and healthy lad. He conceived a great and abiding love and regard for Ramdas. His perfect trust enabled him to lay before Ramdas the story of his life. He narrated: He lost his mother when he was still a little child, and was thus thrown adrift into the world. He passed under the care of his relations from place to place. So, his higher education was neglected. His elder brother had disappeared many years ago and his whereabouts were unknown. His father, a petty clerk in some office, was touring with his officer in the district. He was without a home. The boy had a religious turn of mind from his childhood. He frequented kirtan parties and sought the society of sadhus. His inherent craving for freedom and peace was thus intensified. He prayed to God to grant him a situation in which he could spend all his time in devotion.

Ramdas found that the boy’s nature was pure and lovable. He was put in charge of the rest-house by a merchant of the city who provided him with his bare needs. His time was his own which he spent in meditation. He was indeed an earnest seeker after Truth. He was simple and guileless. Ramdas felt a strange attraction for him at the very first sight. He questioned Ramdas how he could control the restless mind. Ramdas gave him the Ram-mantram and, thereafter, the mantram was always on his lips.

On Ramdas’ expressing to him his desire to remain in a perfectly solitary place, Madhav suggested the cave just a few yards above the dharmashala on the hill. This cave had been newly rebuilt by raising mud walls at its entrance. Ramdas leaving his seat asked the boy to lead him to the cave. The cave was a narrow and low hole just sufficient for one person to lie down. The mud walls were still undried and the floor was damp. It had a small doorway with shutters. Ramdas entered the cave and told Madhav that he had decided to spend in it the night and some days more. Madhav spread the deer skin on the floor of the cave, and then returned to the rest-house.

Madhav was all kindness to him. He served him in every possible way, but there was something weighing on his mind, and he looked worried. Ramdas found out that he had a debt of a few rupees. God arranged for it and set him free.

Ramdas’ stay in the cave was marked with many periods of fasting. But for his extreme physical weakness during the fasts, he was perfectly at ease and cheerful. It must be noted here that whenever God inspired him to undertake a fast he experienced great elation, similar to what a hungry man would feel when he was provided with a sumptuous feast.

In all, he remained in the cave for a month and a half. He received visits from many devotees of the city. He also went occasionally to the city in the evenings to attend kirtan parties. Once he was invited to a marriage function. A girl in the house was bed-ridden on account of serious illness. Ramdas saw her and prayed to the girl’s father to entertain the poor of the town with a dinner in the name of God and for the sake of the ailing girl. Generous-hearted man as he was, he agreed to the suggestion. He said that he had already resolved to do so. The feeding of the poor came about in due course, but Ramdas was not in Mangalore for the occasion, as he had left the place earlier. A year later he learnt that the suffering girl had recovered soon after the feeding of the poor. Trust in God is always rewarded.

Meanwhile, Madhav had developed a great attachment for Ramdas. One day Ramdas told him that the Lord willed that His child, that is Ramdas, should take once more to a wandering life. Now the boy appealed, in a piteous voice, that he might also be permitted to go with him. He added that it would be utter misery for him to live separated from Ramdas. At this Ramdas warned him:

“Well, Ram, the path which Ramdas follows is a hard one. For him danger and death have no terror. You must know that he is a reckless, wild and fearless wanderer. He deliberately courts suffering because he has discovered joy in it. Your case is different. So be advised. Do not seek to accompany him.”

Madhav would not yield to persuasion. He was very obstinate. He assured Ramdas that he was prepared to go through any trial in his company, but would never give him up. Ramdas had to acquiesce.

Ramdas decided to start on foot on a long travel to the north, via Gokarn – an important place of pilgrimage on the west coast of India – and informed Madhav about it. Madhav got things ready for the journey. He equipped himself with some cooking utensils and foodstuffs which he shoved into a scrip prepared for the purpose. At this stage he made a request to Ramdas. He desired to change his name, and wanted Ramdas to suggest a new one. Ramdas gave him the name Ramcharandas which he adopted from that time forward. So Ramdas will refer to him henceforth as Ramcharandas.