← In the Vision of GodHis autobiography, book two

CHAPTER XXXVIII

Srinagar

(i) Ramdas Defies Ram

The prolonged stay of Ramdas in Kashmir was causing anxiety to the friends in India, who were deluging him with their communications urging him to leave the hills again for the plains. They were also sending wire upon wire. Janakinath and Amarnath were quite averse to his departure from Srinagar. They suggested that he should make his permanent residence in future in Kashmir and that they would arrange for his stay near Hari Parvat or Harvan. But he was becoming conscious of the pull down to the south, from the friends in Rawalpindi, United Provinces, Kathiawar, Bombay and the southern districts. When he talked of quitting Srinagar the devoted brothers would oppose the idea. With the best of motives they sometimes connived at suppressing the correspondence from the friends in other parts, but they had to abandon this subterfuge when they found that it was of no avail.

Now Gopalrao and his wife Girijabai, Saraswats of Kanara, related to mother Rukmabai, were in Srinagar at this time. They had information about Ramdas and were very desirous of seeing him. Gopalrao communicated with Amarnath Bakshi and expressed his longing to have Ramdas as his guest for some days. Amarnath concealed the contents of this letter from him, fearing that he would leave them on hearing of it.

Meanwhile, Janakinath proposed to take him for the darshan of a Kashmiri sadhu living in a solitary spot outside Srinagar, in the suburbs. The sadhu was said to have been observing a vow of silence for some years. He agreed at first to go with him, but half-way, Ram wanting him to turn back, he returned to the city in spite of pressure on the part of Janakinath and other friends. The same night Amarnath, feeling that he could not any longer withhold the news of the letter from Gopalrao, delivered the epistle to him. Ramdas now decided. “Janakinath,” Ramdas said, “Ram’s will is that Ramdas shall respond to the call from Gopalrao instead of going out of the way to see a silent sadhu, who is not eager to see him. So tomorrow morning he proceeds to Gandarbal, where Gopalrao appears to be living in a house-boat, and will spend some days in his company. It is his earnest desire and the love that he bears for Ramdas that have defeated your plan of a visit to the silent sadhu.”

Janakinath, for whom separation from Ramdas was nothing short of a painful blow, was alarmed at the prospect. Similar were the feelings of Amarnath and Janakinath’s two daughters, those models of purity, simplicity and devotion. But Ramdas had to obey the command of his Lord.

The following morning Ramdas stood up to depart for Gandarbal with Ramcharandas as his companion. But Janakinath stationed himself in the doorway and said:

“Swamiji, I shall see how you will leave my house. I obstruct your egress; you shall not go. I am your Ram. It is Ram’s will that you shall not leave me.”

Ramdas was now fired with a grim determination. He was not in a mood to brook any hindrance, however great. He spoke, and his words rang out in a measured and stern tone.

“Janakinath, Ramdas must go. He cannot be foiled. Even if Ram Himself were to stand in his way he would defy Him and go.”

These words and the manner of their utterance made Janakinath understand that Ramdas was not to be trifled with. He cleared out of the way and agreed to his departure. He would have Ramdas go by tonga, but the distance being only eleven miles Ramdas preferred to walk. After breakfasting on milk and fruits, he took leave of Janakinath and his family, accompanied by Ramcharandas.

About eleven o’clock in the morning, they arrived on the banks of the Sindhu river, where they found a number of house-boats. After a few minutes’ search Ramcharandas discovered the particular house-boat occupied by Gopalrao.

Gopalrao and his wife welcomed Ramdas with excessive joy. The house-boat, a barge with a neat, beautifully furnished dwelling place, consisted of six cabins and a small terrace over the front cabin. There were the drawing room, the dining room, two bedrooms, a store-room and a bath. Artistic curtains adorned the windows, and carpets covered the floor. The boat was lit with electric lights. It was moored in a position on the river from where a charming view of the surrounding landscape could be had. The Sindhu river, noted for its blue water of crystalline purity, was meandering slowly along.

After a week’s stay at this place Gopalrao arranged to have the house-boat moved to Gagribal, at the foot of Sri Shankaracharya hill, in the Dal lake. Gopalrao and Girijabai were overflowing in their love and kindness to Ramdas. They were an ideal couple, fond of each other like a pair of doves, unsophisticated, innocent and playful like children.

When the house-boat was being moved towards the Dal lake by the sturdy Muslim boatmen, Ramdas had an opportunity to have a quiet talk with Ramcharandas.

“Ram,” Ramdas said, “you must prepare yourself to part from Ramdas. He has shortly to leave for the plains and he will not have you go down with him leaving this blessed country. You may remain in Kashmir for some years. It is a suitable place for your sadhana. When you are next seen by Ramdas you must present a visage illumined with the glow of Self-realisation and eyes filled with the vision of the Infinite. Have full trust in God who is in your heart, and He will look to all your conveniences and comforts during your residence in these cold regions.”

Once more the boy, who had attached himself to Ramdas, evinced signs of perturbation at the idea of separation. He grumbled and fretted over it. Ramdas used all his powers of persuasion to convince him of the necessity for carrying out his suggestion, as it would tend ultimately to his own benefit. At last he agreed to follow Ramdas’ advice.

A word here for Ramcharandas would be appropriate. After Ramdas left him in Kashmir, he had one communication from him, from Rishikesh, some months later, addressed to Anandashram, Kasaragod. From that time up to date, Ramdas has had no news from him. Ramdas remembers the last advice he gave him; and this was: “You should not come to see Ramdas again, until you are radiant with the knowledge and bliss of Brahman. But it is doubtful,” Ramdas added, “if you would feel the need of meeting him at all, when you have attained that supremely blessed state.” Whatever it be, the sweet memory of his fellowship and of the various acts of loving service, he did for Ramdas in his wandering life, will ever remain fresh in his mind. Whatever be the so-called weaknesses he displayed, Ramdas recognised in him a sadhaka of a rare, dauntless spirit, at times riding on the very crest of a wave of burning renunciation, and entirely free from the ego-obsession. His main anchor of belief was that devoted service of the Guru and of saints is the sine qua non of a spiritual life.

A couple of days’ halt in front of a hospital in the Jhelum river, and the house-boat was finally moved into the lake and anchored at Gagribal.

(ii) Behold God’s Majesty in All Things

A few days after their arrival at Gagribal, Ramcharandas departed to Anantnag. A new guest also joined them, a Sikh barrister who took his lodgings in the boat.

Gopalrao was the Vice-Principal of the Khalsa College in Amritsar. He had come to Kashmir on a pleasure-trip during the holidays. He and his wife had also visited Amarnath cave, a day or two in advance of the usual day of pilgrimage. So Ramdas had no occasion to meet them when he went up to the cave. Gopalrao was a generous-hearted and noble-minded soul. His friends were mostly Sikhs and his leanings were towards Sikhism. He held in high veneration the founder of the Sikh religion, Guru Nanak, and had studied Gurumukhi in order to be in direct touch with his teachings. He would, every night before retiring to sleep, make it a rule to go through Sukhmani, a work by Guru Arjun Singh, which is very popular among the Sikhs. Guru Nanak was a great believer in the power of God’s Name. In fact, the only discipline which he prescribed for the control of mind and for spiritual meditation is the singing of God’s Name and His glories.

One day Gopalrao spoke of a Sikh saint who was to visit Srinagar and whom he regarded as a Guru or spiritual preceptor, and said that he greatly wished that Ramdas should be presented to him. A few days after they shifted to Gagribal, the saint arrived, and Ramdas had the opportunity of meeting him along with his friends in a quiet spot on a small piece of green headland in the middle of the Dal lake. Bhai Vir Singh, popularly known as Pitaji among his disciples and admirers, was a childlike devotee. He took a great liking for Ramdas. They had a short talk on the teachings of saints, bhakti and the power of God’s Name.

Ramdas would utilize the early mornings to climb up Sri Shankaracharya hill and lose himself in the contemplation of God. The enchanting vision of the landscape, lakes and mountains from the hill top captivated him. During one of his wanderings on the hill he came upon a cave. In one of his trips uphill, Gopalrao and his wife also accompanied him. Ramdas was given to ascending it by direct paths. So the friends, when they followed him upon the hill, had a most trying time of it as he was running up like a squirrel.

One day a young Gujarati came to the house-boat in search of Ramdas. He was the Secretary to the Yuvaraja, the eldest son of the Thakur Saheb of Limbdi. The father had wired his son to see Ramdas. The son was staying in Srinagar at the time. His motor-car carried Ramdas to the Yuvaraja’s house-boat moored in the Jhelum river in front of the late Maharaja’s palace. The Yuvaraja’s time was fully crowded with engagements as he confessed, and so Ramdas had an interview with him for about five minutes, when they had only a formal talk about health, etc.

About this time Ramdas met K. Sadashivarao, Director of Army Audit, who had also come to Kashmir with his family on a pleasure excursion. He with his wife and two daughters came on a visit to the house-boat. Soon after this Durgadas Nagarkatte invited to his bungalow Sadashivarao with his family, Gopalrao and his wife and Ramdas. They had a happy time of it together for a couple of days.

One morning Ramdas discovered Durgadas and Gopalrao, seated under the shade of a chenar tree in front of the bungalow, discussing the genuineness and value of some precious stones which Gopalrao had recently purchased. Ramdas approached them. Durgadas handed to Ramdas an opal and exclaimed:

“What a beautiful stone!”

Ramdas at once bent down and picked up a stone from the ground and holding it up said: “Why can you not see the same beauty in this stone and majesty in the yonder mountain? Every thing is God’s creation, everything is displaying beauty. Why speak only of that particular stone?” They smiled and kept silent.

Kabir and Uddhav were as loving and kind as ever.

At this time Ramdas, in the company of Gopalrao, his wife and a guide, went on a visit to the famous silk factory of Srinagar. The Muhammadan manager of the factory, who was very kind and obliging, took the party round the works. He explained to them the various processes through which the raw silk passed before the finished product, in the shape of twisted hanks of glossy yarn, could be obtained. When he was dilating upon the boiling of the silk larva by steam, in front of the contrivance intended for it, he could not help remarking with a tinge of regret: “I am sorry, but I have the ill-luck to become the means of destroying every day thousands of innocent worms.” After the visit they returned to the residence of Durgadas.

Before the party broke up, Sadashivrao desired that Ramdas should pay him a visit at Rawalpindi where he was posted, if Ramdas happened to go down to the plains through that city. Ramdas, Gopalrao and Girijabai returned to the house-boat.

Ramdas’ daily wanderings on the Shankaracharya hill drew him often to the cave on it. It appeared to be exerting on him a strange fascination. In the moon-lit nights Gopalrao would take him and Girijabai for boating on the lake. The glory of those nights in the midst of the bewitching charms of Kashmir does not lend itself to description. Sometimes they would also have baths in the cool waters of the lake.

Once the party visited the famous gardens of Kashmir in a special gondola engaged for the purpose. On their return trip, when the boat was midway on the lake, a storm burst and as a result the boat swayed most ominously. The inmates were frightened, but they saw with unfeigned surprise Ramdas capering with great glee. However, the storm subsided and the party regained the house-boat without any mishap.

Whenever there was a shortage of a hand in a game of bridge, Gopalrao would have Ramdas fill the vacancy. They also played a game called Bolshevik and Ramdas invariably turned out to be a rabid and reckless Bolshevik in the game.

One day Girijabai received a wire from her father at Honavar that her mother was seriously ill. The tidings upset her and she became wistful and gloomy. That evening when Ramdas was sitting alone on the terrace of the boat, Girijabai rushed up to where he was, and with folded hands revealed her gnawing anxiety about her mother.

“Ramdas,” she pleaded, “if you would give me an assurance that my mother is all right by now, and that I would receive a wire to that effect tomorrow I should be free from a load of unbearable misery.”

“Trust God, mother, and everything will be all right,” Ramdas replied.

These heartening words immediately dispelled her sorrow and she became again the same lively and bright-faced girl that she was. Her pure and simple faith brought about the fruition of her wish. On the following day she got a wire from her father to say that her mother was past danger.

(iii) Illumination in the Cave

Gopalrao’s vacation was now coming to a close. He proposed to take Ramdas with him to Amritsar. He engaged a special motor-car for the journey to Rawalpindi, but Ramdas’ attraction for the cave on the hill did not permit him to accompany him. God willed that he should live in the cave for some days. He disclosed this fact to Gopalrao, who was greatly disappointed at the news, but had to submit to the inevitable. His deep concern for Ramdas induced him to leave word with Bhai Vir Singh, the Sikh saint, to have a watchful interest in Ramdas. He left Srinagar with his wife and the same evening Ramdas occupied the cave.

The interior of the cave was spacious although the entrance was narrow. Since the cave had been frequented by goats that grazed on the hill, the place inside was extremely dirty with their droppings and urine. There was a small Chenar tree at the mouth of the cave and a flat slab of stone at its base.

Ramdas then possessed only one thin ochre-coloured, plain Kashmir shawl presented by Gopalrao, and nothing else. The floor in the cave was of two levels. As you enter you come to the lower ground, at the end of which is a raised platform reaching the back hollow wall of the cave. The ground and the pedestal were rugged and sharp bits of gravel lay thickly scattered on them. Even during the day semi-darkness prevailed in the cave. As the sun was about to set, Bhai Vir Singh came hastening up the hill to where Ramdas was and said:

“I have heard that you are going to stay in this cave. You may command me to supply you with whatever you want.”

“Ramdas wants nothing,” was Ramdas’ reply.

“No, that will not do; I will arrange to provide you with food, blankets and rugs,” he exclaimed.

“Ramdas wants to remain here for some days without food and comforts. So please don’t trouble yourself,” Ramdas put in.

“I cannot agree with you there. You must permit me to feed and look after you. I will consider it as no small privilege. I will not allow you to starve. Tell me what you would have. Don’t think that you can put me off so lightly,” he said.

In fact Ramdas wished to live in that solitary spot for some days, undisturbed with the food and drink questions. But the saint was obdurate and Ramdas had to yield and stipulate:

“Well, maharaj, you may provide him at midday with a small quantity of boiled rice mixed with milk; that is all.”

“That is not all,” he answered quickly, “what about evening? I would have you take at least some fruit and milk.”

Ramdas became helpless in the hands of one who was determined to feed him. The saint left. When darkness set in Ramdas entered the cave and took up his position on the raised ground, using a part of the thin shawl for spreading on the floor, and lay down flat on the rough gravel.

About ten o’clock a stout and fair-looking boy-servant of the saint came, lantern in hand, carrying a mat of stout reeds and some blankets. Ramdas spread the mat at the place where he lay down, and having a blanket folded up for a pillow he returned the surplus blankets and bade good-night to the lad.

The cave was pitch-dark in the night. He stretched himself on the mat at full length and covered his body with his shawl. He did not feel much cold as the cave was warm within. The whole night he was awake. After midnight he heard beside him a rustling noise and squeaks as of rats which did not in any way molest him.

The night passed and the day dawned. He went out and sat on the slab of stone at the foot of the Chenar tree and drank in the picturesque scenes of the lake, mountains and growth of green foliage. As noon approached he retired into the cave.

Now an old Muslim paid him a visit. He expressed his surprise at seeing Ramdas dwelling in the cave and added:

“Are you aware that there are two serpents in this cave? Many goats that strayed into this cave have fallen victims to their poisonous fangs. You see a hole just a few inches from the place where you rest your head. It is their home. Did you not have any trouble from them? How long have you been in this place?”

“Ramdas has been staying here since last evening,” Ramdas replied. “In the night, except that he heard the squeak of rats and a rustling noise caused by them, he had no other disturbance.”

“Ah!” he exclaimed, with eyes wide open and his bearded head shaking, “they are the serpents, not rats as you suppose. They produce a cry similar to that of rats. I have not visited the cave for a long time and was under the impression that the serpents might have left the place. Now I know they are still there. Be warned. Leave this dreadful place at once. Somehow, they spared you last night; you cannot be sure of the future.”

“Ramdas has no fear. He stops in this cave under the protection of God and by His command. So he would continue to reside here,” Ramdas replied.

The old man nodded his head again with grave and doubtful looks. The talk turning into other channels; he spoke of a Muslim sadhu who had been living in the cave for thirty years and this was twenty years ago. Giving Ramdas a second warning the kind-hearted old man left.

The boy-servant of Bhai Vir Singh brought food and milk at midday and in the evening regularly. Sometimes, Ramdas would be sitting on the hill on a lower peak than that of the temple, absorbed in blissful abstraction and would forget to go down to the cave at meal time. But the faithful boy would quietly search for Ramdas with the food basket in hand and when he found Ramdas feed him wherever he might be sitting.

Bhai Vir Singh, Janakinath, Shambunath and several Sikh friends would pay him visits during the day and furnish him with pots for water and charcoal, kangdi, matches, etc. to keep a fire against cold, but Ramdas never used these materials. Shambunath, whom Ramdas had met at Panchatarni, desired to have him for a few days at his house on his leaving the cave.

Ramdas lived in the cave for a week, during which time he never bathed, drank or used water. Water could be had only from the lake which was at the foot of the hill, fairly three furlongs down from the cave. He never descended the hill in those days.

On the night of the seventh day he had a strange experience. It might have been past midnight. The interior of the cave was as usual utterly dark. Suddenly a brilliant bluish light lit up the entire cave. He seemed to be absorbed in that light, which lasted only for a few seconds, and then it gradually disappeared throwing the cave again into depths of darkness.

On the eighth day, early morning, i.e. the day following the vision of light, he left the cave and presented himself at the kuti of saint Bhai Vir Singh, who welcomed him with open arms.