← The Gospel of Swami RamdasHis talks, as recorded by Swami Satchidananda

1953-01-10

Chapter 12

Anandashram, January 10, 1953

99. Likhit Japa Target

7.30 a.m. Papa was returning from the toilet. Lakshmi's son Sriram four or five years old, was crying aloud in the adjoining room. Papa came rushing and asked him, "Sriram, why are you crying?" Lakshmi said it was pure obstinacy and nothing else. Papa now told him, "If you cry any more, Kanna will be asked to take you into the goshala and lock you up inside. Kanna is here right now. Do you want to be tied up in the goshala near our stud-bull Madhava?" The moment he heard Papa's voice he stopped crying. Ashram children were terribly afraid if they were told that they would be tied up with the cows in the goshala. That threat was generally the last resort of Mataji to tame mischievous children.

It was past noon. Papa was about to go for his midday rest. In the hall Swami Krishnananda was fanning him; Motiben and S were massaging his body and Mataji and Ramkishor were sitting in front of the asan, writing Ram Nam. A few days after Papa had started on his tour in November last, the ashramites started writing Ram Nam as directed by Mataji. It was done with the prayer that Papa should return to the ashram safe. On account of ill-health Papa had to cancel further programmes and return from the tour after a month and three days. After return, Papa asked the ashramites to continue writing Ram Nam. He said it was by the power of Ram Nam that he returned without any serious breakdown. Besides endorsing this, Mataji said that all should write Ram Nam with greater zeal and enthusiasm, and increase the daily record as much as possible. The target was originally fixed at twentyeight lakhs. Later on she raised it to fourteen crores. So Ram Nam-writing was in full swing with almost everybody in the ashram and also visitors taking part in it.

In the course of a talk on writing Ram Nam S told Mataji that the cost of note books for writing one lakh Ram Nam would be seven rupees. The note-books to write fourteen crores would cost about ten thousand rupees. She asked how much had been spent so far. She was told that it was about sixty rupees.

Mataji remarked: "Don't worry about the cost. Let us go on with the writing and finish fourteen crores. Money will come somehow."

100. Power of Ram Nam – Likhit Japa Purely Nishkama?

Papa: Hyderabad devotees were spending lots of money for purchasing note-books for writing Ram Nam. They might have easily spent about four or five thousand rupees. But do you know what wonder Ram Nam has done to them? They were then under the terror of the Razakars and living in constant fear. Many came to Ramdas and wanted to know what they should do to be safe from danger. Ramdas asked them to go on writing or repeating Ram Nam. Thousands of them started repeating Ram Nam in great earnestness. The result was that in a short time the Government of India took what they called 'Police Action' which put an end to the Razakar menace and brought peace to Hyderabad.

S: By the effect of Ram Nam, do all troubles disappear, or do the people get inner strength to withstand the troubles?

Papa: Both. The troubles may vanish. If the troubles still persist in spite of Ram Nam, the devotees will have the strength to bear them bravely.

S: Will not the repetition with the desire to ward off troubles come under the category of sakama bhakti, devotion with a special purpose?

Papa: Of course, it is sakama.

Mataji: Papa, our Ram Nam-writing in the ashram is not sakama. This cannot be sakama as we are doing it only for your long life, so that you may give eternal peace to all.

Papa: Then it is both sakama and nishkama at the same time, as the desire is for achieving eternal peace.

Swami Krishnananda: How can we call it sakama? Desire to attain liberation cannot be taken as sakama at all.

S: Papa, we – Mataji and others – have already discussed the subject and have come to the conclusion that our Ram Nam-writing is purely nishkama.

Papa: O, you have already discussed and decided! Then Ramdas is going to sleep now!

101. Greatness of Ram Nam

10 p.m. Generally devotees would have an enjoyable time with Papa in the afternoons when he talked to them in a jovial manner. But evenings with him would be still better. For half an hour before he went to sleep, four or five would be with him – two massaging his body while the others sat near the cot. Mataji would also be in the group. Papa would then go on making all those present there laugh till their sides ached. The talks generally were on ordinary topics of day-to-day life. But when Papa handled them, he threw out remarks sparkling with wit and wisdom. He would look at the brighter side of things only and that too in the most humorous way. Whenever things went wrong, his highest degree of detachment was clearly seen; when he dealt with those in need or suffering, it was the purest love in action. His courage to start new ventures and face unpleasant situations, was remarkable. Indeed those were not ordinary lessons for those who observed him closely. To understand him was to revere him, love him and worship and also to realise one's incapacity to plumb his depths.

Ramkishor had set his bed near Papa's cot. Mataji was sitting by the side of Ramkishor and fanning him. That day he had written more Ram Nam than on any day so far and had also repeated Ram Nam for an hour. Lying down, Papa was talking to Ramkishor. When reference was made to Ram Nam he said to him: "If you repeat Ram Nam daily and taste the sweetness, you will surely hold on to it and become a mahatma. People will say, 'This is not Ramkishor, but a different person.' Do you know the power of Ram Nam? It is wonderful. Valmiki became a great rishi by repeating Ram Nam, even though he did it in the reverse order. Repeating the Name, he sat absorbed in it for such a long time that his body was covered with earth and white ants. It is well-known how great he became. Take the case of Rishi Narada, the son of a servant woman. By repeating 'Narayana, Narayana' always, he became a devarshi. Can you not see how Ram Nam has transformed Ramdas? Constant repetition of Ram Nam has raised him to this state. What do you see in Ramdas?'

Ramkishor: Everything is all right with you.

Papa: Is he like any other person or different?

Ramkishor: You are slightly different from others.

Papa: What is the difference?

Now Ramkishor thought it better to stop the conversation, as otherwise Papa might corner him on some point. He said, "I am going to sleep." Papa laughed and remarked, "The fellow is afraid and does not want to get caught. So he goes to sleep."

January 11, 1953

102. A separate Room for Papa

Around eight o'clock in the morning, carpenter Vishwakarma, who had been sent for, was standing before Papa. Papa directed him to see Mataji in the kitchen. Mataji asked him first to take some tiffin and coffee. After coffee, they both came together and met Papa near the bhajan-hall. After some discussion among themselves Vishwakarma took some measurements at the south-western corner outside the bhajan-hall, and the site was fixed for the construction of a room with flush and bath attached for Papa's use. It had been the desire of Mataji for many years that Papa should have a separate room. The bhajan-hall was then used by Papa for sitting, dining, sleeping and so on and it was always noisy and crowded. The bath room and toilet were at a distance on a lower level; Papa found it difficult to go there. The bhajan mandir then consisted of a main hall and an attached room. It was the first structure of the ashram. In those days the hall was protected from wind and rain, by bamboo mattings. Later on, in 1940 or so a veranda on all sides was added and the bamboo mattings were replaced by laterite wall and wooden doors. The hall was a spacious one and at the southern end Papa sat for bhajan on a raised asan facing north. The rest of the time he sat on a chair at the north-western corner, where there were a book-shelf, a radio and a radiogram. Devotees came at all hours of the day and met him in that hall. Papa had, of late, been feeling that he needed some quiet time in a room of his own. Rani Lalita Devi and Sagarlal Gupta of Hyderabad had sent donations for the construction of the much-needed room for Papa. So that day the idea began to take shape. The carpenter took the measurements and promised to give an estimate the next day.

103. Cosmic Mind does all Thinking

12 Noon. Papa was getting ready for the afternoon nap. Sitting in front of the asan Mataji was writing Ram Nam. There was again some talk about the writing and repetition of Ram Nam. Mataji said that she was repeating Ram Nam orally at least eight times, while she wrote the Mantra once. Papa wondered how this could be possible. He thought that one could repeat only once by the time one wrote a single Mantra. Otherwise the writing would be purely mechanical and it would have no connection with the repetition.

Mataji: By the time I write 'Om Sri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram' once, I repeat the same Mantra many times. I can also repeat in the meantime a few other Mantras which I used to repeat years back. And, in addition, I can think of something about the kitchen work too. They say such things are possible for those who have a double head-line on their palm.

Papa: When Ramdas does something, he cannot take his mind anywhere else. When he writes one Ram Nam, he can repeat it mentally only once.

(To Swami Krishnananda and S): Is there any difference between Ramdas and others? When he is working, talking, and so forth can you make out that he is doing everything in the complete absence of the mind?

S: Papa, this is a hard question for us to answer. But Papa has mentioned somewhere that Papa has a mind which is the most purified and that he has also an ego which is the most purified. What does Papa say now?

Papa: A completely purified mind is no mind in the ordinary sense, but it is the cosmic mind, and the perfectly purified ego is only the universal Self.

S: Does it mean that Papa is doing things like a machine without any thought whatosever?

Papa: The cosmic mind does all the thinking in the world. It is the cosmic consciousness that does everything. It is the cosmic consciousness again, that causes all the thoughts and movements in everyone. There is only one and not two. Others are not conscious of this, but he (Ramdas) is conscious of it.

S: Who is conscious? When Papa says, 'he is conscious' of something, it means there are two.

Papa (laughing): The cosmic consciousness is conscious of the cosmic consciousness, that is of itself. It is all one, and one only!

All laughed.

S: Sometimes you talk about Ram as different from you, don't you?

104. Recording the Talks

Suddenly Papa remembered something and turning to S asked him: "You were once recording Ramdas’ talks. Are you still doing it?'

S: Yes, Papa. I have been doing it. It is not continuous. There are long breaks.

Papa: Ramdas thought as much.

Swami Krishnananda: How did Papa know that he is doing it now?

Papa: Somehow Ramdas smelt it. Otherwise he was about to suggest it to him. Ramdas knew, whenever any conversation took place between him and Ramdas or between others and Ramdas, he would note down important points. The devotees of Sri Ramakrishna have recorded beautifully some conversations. They perhaps wrote down immediately so that they could get the very words of Sri Ramakrishna.

S: Papa, I am writing them before I go to bed.

Papa: Are you recording only spiritual talks or other talks also?

S: I record a lot of fun too. Without Papa's jokes there is no fun in recording.

Papa: Yes, without fun it will be a serious and dry affair. Now Ramdas should sleep.

Now Mataji, Swami Krishnananda, and S got up and were about to leave the hall, when two others stood on either side of Papa to fan him. Papa then remarked, "You have handed over charge of Ramdas to these two. They are to be the caretakers now." Looking at them, he said, "Do you know Sri Ramakrishna's words? Let your hands be fanning while your minds are fixed on God". He then pulled the thin white sheet over himself and went to sleep.

January 12, 1953

105. Yogi Milarepa

For the last two or three days Papa had been reading ‘Yogi Milerapa’, the biography of a Tibetan saint. Early in the morning he started reading it aloud to the devotees gathered round him. Among the listeners was the American friend, Ray Magee. When Papa stopped reading, this friend asked: "Do you place this saint on the same level as Buddha, Krishna or Christ?"

Papa: Ramdas is just reading the book. But the author has said that Milarepa was considered as great as Buddha or Christ.

Ray Magee: If such saints are considered so great, why don't they exert their influence on people as Buddha and Christ do? Now, in your case Buddha and Christ came to you in a vision, but no other saint. If others are equally great, why did they not come?

Papa: Ramdas saw Gandhiji also in a vision. First he had the vision of Sri Krishna. He had the vision of these three – Krishna, Buddha, Christ – because he was thinking more of them than others, and drawing inspiration from them. He was also keeping with him, ‘The Bhagavad Gita’, ‘The Light of Asia’, and ‘The New Testament’. His Vision of Gandhiji was not a very clear one.

Ray Magee: Saints like Milarepa may not be so great as Buddha, Krishna and Christ, because in their earlier life they were only ordinary men, leading the usual life of the world, and then realised the Truth. Is my view correct?

Papa: No, that makes no difference. Buddha was an ordinary prince, subject to all the vasanas as others, in early life. Still in later years, he became a source of inspiration for millions of people. Even now, you know, millions of people follow him and draw inspiration from him. For Ramdas, on the ethical side, Buddha was the ideal.

106. Open Spaces Broaden Vision – Die to Live

The talk gradually drifted to Papa's wandering life, about which he said, "In those days Ramdas used to wander like a free and blissful child. The extensive open spaces attracted him very much. Once he stayed in a hill in Kashmir. He spent all the time gazing at the vast expanse of hills and lakes. The very sight charmed the mind. It became still without any effort and he sat for hours together, totally absorbed.

"Ramdas pities the plight of people living in small rooms. How can they expand their vision? They do not find time to go to any open place outside the town. People living such lives cannot but be narrow-minded and selfish. During his wandering life, Ramdas never liked to stay in houses, especially in cities. Now, of course, he goes and stays wherever he is invited. His life has taken a different colour now."

Ray Magee: What is the Mantra that you are all repeating here?

Papa: 'Om Sri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram'. This Mantra represents both the manifest and the unmanifest aspects of God. OM is the first sound wave that rose from the Unmanifest and is the cause of the universal manifestation – creation, preservation and destruction. There are many who repeat only OM, still their minds and realise the primeval source of all manifestation. Through OM they reach the absolute, unmanifest Truth.

Ray Magee: When I was meditating once, I heard a voice telling me, 'Give up your mind.' At that time I could not understand what that meant. I thought it was all meaningless and did not give any importance to the voice.

Papa: The voice was right. It was guiding you. 'Give up your mind' means surrender your mind to God.

Ray Magee: Another time, while engaged in deep meditation, I could feel I had reached a point and again I heard the voice say: 'If you break it, you will die. If you do not, you will live a good man.' I had to decide that very moment. I thought that life was worth living, but now I realise I made a mistake in deciding as I did. I don't know if I will have another chance to decide.

Papa laughed and said: "There, death meant the death of the ego, the lower self. The ego must die. You must die to live. An earnest aspirant was once going about in search of a Guru. He met a saint who, to all external appearance, was a beggar, living on the remains of food thrown from houses in a village. He was clothed in dirty rags. The aspirant however recognised him as a great mahatma and followed him wherever he went. For a fortnight he followed the saint like his shadow, but never did the saint speak a word to him. The villagers, who were watching this young man following the saint day and night, asked the saint why he was so unkind to the aspirant, why he did not bless him, why he did not even care to look at him. At this the saint smilingly called the aspirant, looked at him and said: 'Ja, Marja', which meant 'Go and die'. The aspirant felt blessed. He got enlightenment. Death here means death of the ego. We should not have fear for such a death."

In the evening, Papa went for his usual walk. CR Rao, Ramkishor and S were following him. They were walking on the open ground in front of the ashram and had gone a few yards beyond the dispensary building, when a boy from the Udyog Shala brought a chit to Papa. Reading the chit, which was from Gopal, Papa asked those by his side, "What is the date today, 12th or 13th? It is 12th." He added, "Gopal has written 13th. He is so absent-minded; Ramdas will have some fun with him tonight when he comes to the ashram." Papa then put a big interrogation mark against the date shown, wrote a few lines in reply to Gopal's query, and sent the boy away with the chit.

Papa then wanted to return. He said, "Ramdas is not in a mood to walk further today. His stomach is bloated with a lot of gas. He feels uneasy. What did he take in the noon to suffer from wind?'

S: Papa took the curry made from white beans. That is a pucca gas producing agent.

Papa: Ah, you are right. Ramdas never thought it was so bad. He wants to avoid all such preparations. But Mataji wants that everything prepared in the kitchen should be brought to him, to be seen by him. It is like naivedya (offering of food to God). But they forget it is not an offering to a stone-god that does not eat but to a living God who eats! Ramdas ought to have asked them to remove the dish straightaway, from the plate. He did not do it. He tasted a bit, found it nice, and took more. His hand would automatically go to take more and more. Now he pays the penalty. You may give some Hingashtaka to Ramdas.

On return, S gave Papa the medicine and also tied a piece of flannel round his abdomen as protection against cold.

107. Bank of Ram Nam

Evening bhajan was about to start. When S entered the hall, he saw Papa removing the flannel. When he asked Papa why he was taking it off, Papa said, "Oh, it is so uncomfortable; when loose, it slips down; and if it is tight, Ramdas cannot sit properly."

S: How is Papa's stomach now?

Papa: 'Stomach' is there in its position. Ramdas polished off two rotis just now – so it is all right." (Laughter) Continuing, he said: "Is this not like the story of the sadhu who had stomach-ache and was cured when the doctor, whom he consulted, took him home and fed him with some big-sized laddus?" (A ripple of laughter)

It was 9 p.m. All the ashramites and the visitors who had written Ram Nam brought their note-books for Papa's signature. Papa was sitting in the bhajan-hall surrounded by the devotees. S was sitting in front of Papa to write down on a note-book the names of the devotees and the number written by each. This was the Ram Nam Bank where the devotees had come to deposit their daily earnings. All the note-books were signed by Papa. The total came to sixteen thousand and two hundred and seventyfive.

Papa: Ah, it is less today. Why is the figure going down?

At the time Gopal brought his note-book for signature. Papa looked at him, laughed and asked: "Gopal, what is the date today, 12th or 13th?" Gopal had by then known his mistake. He kept quiet for a while. In the meantime Papa himself added, "Gopal, you are a day ahead."

Gopal: I have no calendar there, Papa.

Papa: That is a very fine excuse. (Laughter)